"True silence is the rest of the mind; it is to the spirit what sleep is to the body, nourishment and refreshment." ~ William Penn
Our lives have been made much easier thanks to the hundreds of electronic gadgets and gizmos we come across every day; cell phones, computers, dishwashers, televisions, Playstations, X-Boxes, IPods, washing machines, planes, trains and automobiles just to name a few. What we have lost in return however, is the gift of silence. Rarely in the course of a day do most of us find any true peace and quiet. Nor are we treated to the pure, clean sounds of nature without the annoying background buzzes and beeps of modern life.
Our bodies and our spirits need silence to heal, to renew and refresh. Much of our irritability can be traced back to a lack of quiet time.
Studies prove that women typically are more sensitive aurally than men, probably because we've been alert to the sounds of our babies crying for ages. I'm living proof of that theory. My husband has found me many a morning wide awake and exhausted with my head buried under several pillows trying to drown out the mysterious hum coming from outside our window. He can no longer charge his cell phone in our bedroom because I can hear the charger when it's plugged into the socket. Our teenage children don't have a chance in hell of sneaking in or out of this house when I'm around. In order to maintain what is left of my sanity, I make a point of treating myself to moments of quiet every day. Here are a few suggestions to help you find the silence your body is craving.
- Turn off and unplug appliances and machinery when not in use.
- Take a walk or ride your bike without listening to your IPod. Just enjoy the sound of nature live and in person.
- Sit in the park on your lunch hour.
- Use manual versions of appliances when possible. Remember what a real can opener looked like before we could plug them in?
- Turn off the television, radio and cell phone for an hour or more.
- Pet your cat and listen to her purr.
- Enjoy some soothing music. I'm a huge fan of Spa Radio at http://www.pandora.com/.
- Purchase a sound machine. Mine has settings for a bubbling brook, rain, ocean waves, birds, heartbeat and white noise. While still an electronic device, it can at least mask the harsh sounds of my son saving the world on his XBox.
Silence, one more way to take care of yourself, mind, body and spirit.
In the movie Office Space, Jennifer Aniston's character is scolded by her boss for having only the minimum required pieces of flare on her uniform. For many of us, our days are fairly uniform, there's not much difference between one day and the next. We go along doing what needs to be done, then we wake up in the morning and do it all over again. Lather. Rinse. Repeat. So I ask you, where's the flare?
This week I challenge you to add a few extra pieces of flare to the uniform of your daily life.
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Serve dinner on your best dishware. It doesn't matter if it's frozen pizza, Lean Cuisine or filet mignon, set a proper table with napkins, silverware and crystal glasses. Even milk tastes special when served in a flute.
~ Treat yourself to a spa night. Warn your family that you are only to be interrupted on account of fire, bloodshed or death. Lock the door, light a candle and add some scented oils to your bath. Lie back, close your eyes and relax until your fingers and toes are pruny. Be sure to dry off with the fluffiest towel in the closet and wrap up in your comfiest robe or pajamas.
~ After the kids are in bed, turn off the television, put on some mood music, (I prefer Marvin Gaye and Al Green but whatever gets you going), grab your honey and dance nice and slow. Remember what it was like before life got in the way? When all you could think about was how long you had to wait before you could get naked together? Go back there tonight. You'll be glad you did.
~ Have a family pajama party. Pop loads of popcorn, throw pillows and blankets on the floor, turn off all the lights and watch a movie together. The Princess Bride is one of my personal favorites, it has something for everyone; romance, action, adventure, comedy and a giant. Perfect!
It doesn't take much effort really, just a little imagination and a playful spirit and you can easily bring some flare back into your life.
Mindfulness is a topic I will be discussing often because I believe it is one of the most effective ways to bring peace and balance to our lives.
It seems we are on a never ending quest to cram more and more stuff into our days. We eat our meals in the car. We talk on the phone while walking the dog. We send emails while waiting in line at the store and we text others while listening to our spouse tell us about their day. We have become so adroit at multi-tasking we feel uncomfortable and lazy doing only one thing at a time. We are nearly incapable of living in the moment, always thinking ahead to what has to be done next, so much so, that huge chunks of our time are lost mindlessly rushing through daily tasks that we have no recollection of completing minutes after completing them. We simply function on autopilot.
I'm sure you remember taking a shower this morning but do you recall the scent of your soap? What did the lather feel like in your hands? Did you stop to enjoy the sensation of hot water cascading over your body? Odds are you were already stressed, worried about running late, anticipating the meeting with your boss later this morning, wondering when you'll manage to shovel the driveway and if there's enough hamburger in the fridge for dinner tonight. By the time you got out, I would bet your heart was racing, your jaws clenched and your fists tight. A good fifteen minutes of your life just passed by, fifteen minutes that you can't ever get back, fifteen minutes that should have been spent enjoying a truly wonderful sensual experience.
I challenge you to take your shower mindfully tomorrow. Spend that time thinking only about what you are doing, feeling, seeing, smelling, hearing in that exact moment. Turn on the water and listen to the sound it makes hitting the bottom of the tub. Feel the water get warmer and warmer on your hand. Step in and enjoy the sensation of the hot spray against your skin. Follow the path of a single drop as it runs down the shower wall. Lean your head back and feel your hair get heavy as it soaks up the wetness. Pour some shampoo into your hand and breathe in the fresh scent. Feel the silky smoothness of the lather. Watch as the bubbles pop on your skin...I'll leave you to figure out how to enjoy the rest of your shower time but whatever you do, remain in the present moment, mindfully enjoying every single 60 second in every single minute.
Namaste
Last night I had a truly fabulous massage from Angella at Willow Moon Therapeutic Massage in Rockton, Il which got me to thinking about my next post.
Many of us spend eight or more hours a day parked in front of a computer at our jobs. Then we come home only to spend another couple hours checking personal emails, paying bills online and catching up on the latest news with our friends on Twitter and Facebook. Not only does this contribute significantly to our ever expanding posteriors, it's a major cause of neck, shoulder and back pain. Following are some suggestions to keep you loose and pain-free throughout the day.
1. Move, Move, Move! - Take frequent trips away from your desk. Go talk to a co-worker rather than calling or sending an email. Stand while taking a phone call. Walk around the building or the parking lot at lunch or breaktime.
2. Place a small step or platform under your desk to support your feet. Keep the blood flowing to your lower extremities by doing some leg extensions, heel lifts and toe raises. This is a great way to increase strength and muscle tone without that nasty business of actually breaking a sweat.
3. Stay alert by bringing fresh oxygen to your brain. Stand up, bend at the waist and let your upper body hang loose. Swing gently side to side like a tree blowing in the breeze. Your co-workers may look at you funny but it feels so good, it's worth the harassment.
4. Stretch and stretch again, in fact, stretch a lot!
- Start with your neck. Lower your right ear towards your shoulder. You can push your head down gently to deepen the stretch. Come back to center, then repeat on the left side. Come back to center, now lower your chin to your chest.
- Raise your arms over your head. Now with your left hand, grasp your right wrist and gently pull up. Repeat on the left side.
- Clasp your hands behind your back and if you can, roll your shoulders back, pinching your shoulder blades together.
5. Sit tall and proud like mom always said. Fight the temptation to slouch over your keyboard.
6. Give yourself mini massages by walking your fingers up and down your neck and over your shoulder muscles, or you could just ask the cute new guy in accounting to do it for you. Whatever works.
My final piece of advice is to remember to breathe. Take a few slow deep cleansing breaths. Inhale for the count of four, let your belly expand, feel your lungs filling with air. Hold for two. Exhale for the count of six, releasing the air from the lungs down, feel your belly deflate. Do this several times throughout the day, especially when you feel yourself getting tense.
Take care and stay loose!
I've always had poor eyesight but I recently discovered it's poor in a sense that I hadn't thought of before.
After taking a shower the other morning, I looked into the mirror and was surprisingly pleased with what I saw. My glasses were off and it was before I'd put my contacts in so the image in the glass was somewhat hazy but I could see it was me and I looked fit, healthy, and while not exactly what one would call "slender", not the woman in the sumo suit I typically see. Wow, maybe all this healthy eating, yoga, biking and my new found sobriety really is making a difference. Then I made the fatal mistake of putting in my contacts and right before my very eyes, I morphed back into the middle aged, fat woman that normally greets me every morning.
Logically I know that because I'm nearsighted, there cannot be that much of a difference between the two images. With my vision at 20/20, all the parts of my body that I don't like become glaringly apparent; the wrinkles, the stomach pooch after having 2 children, stretch marks, a C-section scar, droopy breasts, and the cottage cheese thighs. Without glasses or contacts however, the woman in the mirror is a softer, more gentle representation of myself and I've decided I like that look. It's the one I choose to see.
My challenge for you this week is to look at yourself in a whole new way. Remove the glasses that make you see your so called "flaws" so clearly. Instead, take a step back from the mirror, don't focus so hard, dim the lights and soften your edges. This is you, and you are beautiful. I want you to do one more exercise, look into your own eyes and say aloud, "I love you,". Go ahead and give yourself a big kiss and be sure to leave the lipstick stain on the glass as a reminder of just how sexy you are!
